Barcelona -- Business As Usual

I forgot about my trip to Barcelona when I was with the BPD. I was traveling for work -- a quick three day trip into and out of the country for work where I was giving training. Of course, when you give training, you need to be alert and sharp. When you're sleep deprived because you're dealing with a Borderline, it's tough.

The BPD had her parents come and stay with her. It was a tough one -- from the start, the BPD didn't like me going away on business. International business made the BPD very nervous. Any business made the BPD very nervous.

On my previous trip which I had gone on the month before, I came back to a bag packed outside the house I lived and the locks changed. I wasn't expecting much when I got back.

The BPD's father talked some sense into her. He told her that I should be able to go on trips and not talk with her at all. That would be completely acceptable -- talking once during the entire trip would be acceptable, according to her father.

She took her father's word at face value, and I felt so relieved. Wow, I'm going to be able to have a normal trip.

Everything was normal on the trip. As a result, I gave part of the training session and did quite well.

The last night before leaving Spain, The CEO of the company, another trainer and myself went out to dinner. We had Tapas and walked through the town of Barcelona for a couple of hours. During dinner, the BPD called me, and I told her that I was in the middle of dinner. I told her that I'd call her back in a little bit.

Not good enough for the BPD. She raged, all angry and upset about this, accusing me of doing I-don't-know-what to this day. She evidently thought that I went and saw prostitutes, I guess. I came back with gifts for the children from the gift shop, and this wasn't enough. She said that I should have gotten gifts from the town of Barcelona and not the airport gift shop.

After dinner, I got back to my room and the BPD wouldn't talk with me. I spent hours trying to get in touch with her, then when I could get in touch with her, she freaked out on me and said terrible things. The phone charges from Barcelona to the United States were steep, and I ended up with a $1,200 phone bill. That's right -- a $1,200 phone bill for four days of travel.

As a result of the Barcelona trip, I was forced to get STD tests because of the BPD's accusations. Once again, I was accused of all these terrible things, and I found myself proving my innocence.

In the end, one shouldn't have to prove their innocence. A relationship like this has a number of fundamental issues, particularly that the relationship is imbalanced and no trust. Relationships should not be like this. They should be caring, loving with all the trust in the world. It's not out of reach if you really want it.