I know that I sometimes digress and put song lyrics in here, stories about my personal life and family, but jeez, don't we need something besides the same ole, same ole? Try to keep it interesting...
Some have told me that I should make my blog posts shorter so I have more content. Others have told me to stop blogging. Many others have told me to keep going.
I'm still going, as we can see. Thanks to Jennie for being my number one fan. A much lesser person would have been so insanely jealous that she never could have stomached me writing about another relationship, my feelings then and now, and my brutal honesty. I appreciate her support and encouragement and will be grateful for my lifetime.
Not Always a Pleasant Road
This blog has had its ups and downs. After I first met Jennie, I was going to shut the blog down, and I actually didn't post for a couple of months. I still had healing to do and had to keep it going. So I did.
I've written many times before that the main reason that I keep going is because of your comments. This is true, but sometimes I get not-so-pleasant comments along with the pleasant comments. The worst one I've ever gotten is below. I never published it because of the curses (I'm not able to edit comments -- I either need to publish them as is or reject them):
You stupid, bitter man. Your blog is sh**. It's unbelivable how you think there's nothing wrong with you.
Do you really think borderline is incapable of empathy? Do some f***ing research. Some of them are, some of them are not.
Why do you think borderline cuts? Why do you think borderline hates herself more than anything? BECAUSE SHE THINKS SHE HAS TO CARRY ALL TO GUILT _BECAUSE OF F***ING PROJECTION_. It goes that way, too. She blames others too, yes. But deep inside she thinks everything about her is just so wrong. You are just too selfish to understand that.
And I don't give a f*** about the fact that you're not going to publish this.
So, first, I did publish this whomever-you-are. In the future, please email me if I'm missing something. You needn't be so nasty in your emails, but your identity is hidden, so I guess you can be passive aggressive. I hope you feel much better after sending such a nasty email as this.
So that was the worst one -- but overall, it's been such a wonderful ride. I get to hear from each of you, and read about each of you and your stories -- they're all so different, but so much the same.
In the end, we were all hurting so badly, so in need of help, a lifeline, anything to get us out of the abyss of a BPD partner.
I'm not a doctor, do not provide professional advice, but I am a kindred spirit. I've been there. I've hurt. I've gotten myself out of the abyss and have dealt with the pain that we have all felt. It sucks.
200 posts later, I'm much better.
The future will continue to see more BPD recovery. I may expand the community to include new websites, such as www.mybpdrecovery.com and www.bpdrelationshiprecovery.com, where I may open up forums and link into more resources for those recovering from a relationship with a borderline.
The ride continues. Enjoy it.
To read your worst post was incredibly haunting. Word for word it sounds exactly like what my ex might have said. I wonder what the odds are.
ReplyDeleteTo read your worst comment was incredibly haunting. It was if I was reading or hearing something from my ex. The word choices and style match hers exactly. What are the odds?
ReplyDeleteKeep it up! when sharing ideas with the general public there will always be some negative comments, wether you discuss on BPD, politics or football, don't let it affects you, know that your posts help us. It's been two years now since i broke w/ my ex-girlfriend after 3 years, I discovered to late she may have BPD or histrionic, it's been a long journey putting my self back and fighting against depression, she's got pregnant from a lover and that was the shocking end. Of course she never told me a word until it's become physically evident and then she put herself into the victim mode and said it was my fault... the most damaging for me was that she experienced no remorse, she used to have tons of energy to stalk me but zero to apology or give explanations, again not her fault, it never was. True we should use our energy to learn from this and change ourself for better, become less co-dependent.. Im now a more compasioned person and sensitive to others needs, I learned good things from this person and wish her can get rid of BPD.
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