It's time to put it to bed. There are too many possibilities out there right now, and life is just too darn good to worry about these things anymore. It's tough when you're in a relationship with a BPD because you end up sacrificing most of yourself for them.
When you get out of the relationship, you don't know what to do. Every moment that you have of free time -- isn't free. It's spent devoting yourself to the BPD. When you do suddenly get a free moment, you feel paralyzed because you're so afraid that the BPD will accuse you of a multitude of things.
Anyway, she can't haunt me anymore. I'll still be looking over my shoulder for some time, but that will also subside in time. She can't make my life crazy anymore, which is nice.
It's my life again. The Me Project will continue, but in terms of closing this chapter, I'm turning the page. I'll continue to heal, but I'm not feeling so crushed, so hurt, so chaotic anymore.
The time has come. Move on. Stay healthy. Make sure that the next partner is emotionally healthy and stable, does not have huge amounts of baggage, supports me, etc. They'll have substance which I admire and respect. They'll be driven.
Goodbye Oz. I'm going back to the real world, living life day by day, planning for the future.
I can't wait to see what's coming my way.
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